Learning to Stay

There was an ache in me that showed up yesterday.

A familiar sadness in the center of my chest.

It whispered,

“I am here again.”

I wondered if it was the missed opportunity.

The unattended class.

The unresponsive friend.

No. My body knew. 

It’s older than that.

This isn’t about today.

It’s the little girl in me who felt alone,

even when she technically wasn’t.

I noticed the familiar spiral begin.

The urges:

Shop.

Spend.

Ice cream.

TV.

Wine.

Anything.

Anything to not sit in it.

For a long time, throughout my life,

I would do any of the above, if not all.

To overlook it.

To outrun it.

To avoid acknowledging this old companion showing up again. 

But today, I mothered myself.

I met myself.

I acknowledged the real emotion rising.

I accepted myself in that moment,

without trying to change or dismiss my way out.

I chose instead to witness.

I didn’t try to fix it, push through it and I didn’t shame myself for being here with the familiar thoughts...

"What's wrong with you"

"Enough. Knock if off. Get on with it"

"So dramatic. It really isn't that bad." (insert proverbial eyeroll)

Instead:

I slowed down.

I did some laundry.

I took a nap.

I walked the dog.

That’s not a collapse.

It’s someone learning to stay.

It's learning and allowing grief.

Healing isn’t about fixing me.

It’s about meeting me.

It’s becoming willing to feel...

what was never felt.

Staying with myself is safer and far better than running from myself.

And this..

This is the journey to living into your true, authentic self.

xx

🤟🏻
Claire

If this stirred up any hope or curiosity within you, you might be ready for this work. Here is the next step you can take:

👉 Book a call with me

We'll talk about what's going on for you, and if this is the right place for you to be to continue your healing journey.I'm leading my next small, intimate Mother Wound Coaching Group. We start in March.

No pressure.

Just an open door if you feel the pull.

Claire Cetti is a PCI Certified® Parent Coach, Positive Parenting Educator and Mother Wound Coach who has helped hundreds of women who are struggling with frustration, anger, and yelling become calmer, more confident, and more connected with their kids for almost 10 years. She is also a stepmom and the mom of four young adult children, and she lives in Santa Barbara with her husband and fur baby, Bella.​