LISTENING

I recently came across a letter I wrote to my kids that I want to share with you.

Especially in light of all that's going on in our world today.

It's a letter I had felt compelled to write to them as I found myself becoming astutely aware of my insecurities, aka fears, that were arising within me as they were quickly becoming young adults. I knew if I didn't assess and acknowledge what was happening within me and address it, I could very well be losing out on the deep relationships I desired to have with them as adults.

Here goes.

Dear (Kids),

First and foremost, I hope you know how much I love you. More than you'll ever know.

And I also hope you know, I am humanly imperfect. Because of that, I am so sorry if I have ever not fully heard you, listened deeply enough to you or hurt you.

I am an imperfect human (mama) who has lots to learn, wishes to continue to learn, and you have always been my greatest teachers.

You have taught me so many things; but above all you've taught me trust, patience, acceptance and love.

Thank you for teaching me. Thank you for being you.

I truly want a deep connected relationship with you that feels safe for YOU to BE YOU when you are with me.

And that requires listening.

So my promise to you; I will continue to listen.
Listen.
Listen.
and
Listen some more.

I trust you, believe in you and embrace who you are. I cherish the gift you give me by sharing your life experiences with me. I know it's not something you need to or have to do.

Thank you. Thank you for being patient with, believing in and trusting me.
I love you,
Mom

I share this with you because when I came across this letter yesterday, I realized this is also a letter I should be drafting to the Black Community today.

My heart is heavy as it has become humbly apparent that there's still SO much for me to learn when it comes to racism.

And as I learn more, I also know I'm going to get it wrong over and over again. I will say, write or do the wrong thing. My heart already hurts for how many times I've already gotten it wrong.

But my promise to the Black Community, and PoC, is I will continue to keep trying until I hopefully, just maybe, begin to get it right.

And when I fail, damn, I'm going to get up again and continue to try.

Where to begin?

I'm going to begin by listening.

Then listening and listening and listening some more to the voices of the Black Community and Poc. Not just this week...but continually for as long as I am here.

So Mamas. I want to offer this encouragement to you;

In parenting and in life, we are ALL going to stumble, fall and make mistakes. Every single one of us. And we will continue to do so. What matters is how we pick ourselves up, learn from it and move forward; in relationship and repair, that helps us to grow and become better today than we were before.

Times are hard right now. Shoot, parenting is hard enough without all that's going on! Please be kind, be compassionate, be patient with yourself and those around you.

And practice listening. Even if it’s hard and uncomfortable, there's always so much to be learned. And that's a good thing!

I'm here for you.

Meanwhile.

I think You Are Amazing.
xx
💗
Claire